Goa is not India, India – not Goa
For the first time we saw India 2 years ago. Rather, then we lay on the ocean in Goa, enjoyed the sun and really thought that she was India. How much we didn’t know about this country. And now, having lived in the northern part of it more than two weeks, we doubt that we can talk about her, if only as a "good acquaintance".
Usually, the preparation for the expedition lasts no more than 2-3 weeks, during which time documents are issued, a route is built and a distance acquaintance with people, which can help our team find hats on the territory of foreign states. This time we did a little more – flew to Goa two weeks before the start of the expedition, hired a local guide, the driver and began to wait for our body will finally get used to the summer in February. Officially, the stage of the Hat Master expedition on the route India-Nepal started on March 4, and as soon as we were in Delhi, it became clear that Goa was not India yet, and India was not Goa, but in most part Portugal. Tourists with each kilometer who gave us from the resort staff was less, the rest was still abundant.
Do not hurry, but you do not have time
For 2 weeks we drove about 4 thousand. kilometers through the territories of India and Nepal. For those who made the world expedition on the car, this is a bit, at the same time, this is a significant distance, if you consider an anarchy installed on the roads of these two countries. Due to constant traffic jams, we drove at a speed of 20-30 km per hour, spent 20 hours in the car and thanked God for putting us to abandon the expeditionary machine. And yet we rushed around the cities and states gallop – woke up in Jaipur, and have had breakfast on the way to Agru.
Indians do not rush anywhere, because they can afford to live forever. However, several times we still became witnesses of accidents that happened as a result of exceeding the speed regime – the major services, not subject to "resuscitation", lay on the roads as a festive cake, which accidentally dropped to the floor. Indian "trucks" – a special kind of creativity, they are decorated with flowers, ribbons, it is possible to determine the nature, the attitude to religion and the driver’s caste. In general, being a passenger – not boring – you sit in the cabin, and you go past you, never knew about the side interval, Rickshaw, scooters, camels, pilgrims. Traffic lights in the cities of India and Nepal a little, and those that are – for a long time cursed, drivers talk to them, scold them. Sometimes we saw policemen with homemade "bamboo" wands. They affect the road to the road. Very often our team led the navigator, unscrubating us on narrow streets, from which we were then chosen for a long time, so sometimes it is better to stop and ask the road from local.
My address is not a house, and not the street
In India there is no concept of personal space. We came to this conclusion repeatedly – and when they saw the beggars living on two square meters of the sidewalk, and when they heard the loud voices of the neighbors of the hotel. House doors in this country are always open, but we would not call the hospitable people of Indians. And where to invite guests, if 10 people already live in the house. On the streets there are a lot of evil, frowning, angry people who sleep, eat and certify the need in front of the thousand passersby. Do not wait apologies if someone accidentally burned you or stepped on my leg.
In India, it is generally easy to stay without a roof – a lot of hotels, but those you have booked in advance, almost never really. We spent enough time and money to get through to the administrators who were the same "fakes", as well as the addresses indicated on "Buking". Nepalese more conspicuous and friendly.
Prince of dirt
For Indians much more important to have a clean soul than the body. It, of course, is good, any normal person should strive for decency. But what to do if you got used to sleep in a fresh bed. Oddly enough, we quickly got used to the garbage on the streets, to the cow’s rotting there, to cooks with long and dirty nails, and we could not appreciate the primitive service in hotels and guesthouses. It must be said that the Indians are sleeping in clothes that we worn during the day. This tradition is dictated and the lack of heating, and a careless attitude towards its comfort, and the same shortage of free space – many Indians have never had their own room and the cabinet, so they carry their own. We did the same, did not undress. But on the streets, some residents of the country can raise absolutely naked. This is Nagi-Baba – Monks, fully renounced material benefits and more often living in the forests and caves.
Make complaints about dirty towels, sheets with traces of killed insects and other spots, lack of hot water in the room – useless. Tried – we brought even more dirty underwear. Very often in hotels there is no toilet paper. Shower and toilet combine, they have a bucket with a bucket, sticks out a hose.
Environmental attitude in India ugly. It is no coincidence that most of the major cities of this country head the rating of the most ecologically unfavorable territories of the world. Somehow, next to the table in the restaurant, it turned out the garbage bucket into which we folded uncle – the waiter came out with him to the street and empty a bucket of two meters from the establishment.
However, to learn the topic of the relationship of Indians to personal hygiene to the end we failed. He confused an amitate conductor, for each day of the expedition in his baggage was a separate set of clothes.
It is impossible to plan
Simply put, most of India residents are idlers, street life experts. We ceased to regret the beggars and beggars, as soon as they realized that they themselves were completed for a long time with their position. Custom system from the very birth indicates Indian in his place – it can be under the sun, in the rain, under the old canopy or roof of a rich house. With fate in India, it is not customary to argue, but also it is not forbidden to dream. Before leaving, we found themselves in the company of young people, most of which dreams forever leave the country. Someone said that he wants to become a good driver, an inspector to combat drug addiction or a millionaire. About the lucky old age in India, too, you can only dream. Only 12% of the inhabitants of this country can count on retirement support, more often lucky for many years in public position. The rest are counting on the help of children, so they seek to be large parents, despite all the difficulties. It is worth reminding that India ranks second in terms of population, yielding only China.

On the streets of India, many merchants, shoes, good dental clinics and bad beauty salons. In their dusty mirrors, you can not see yourself, but find the reflection of all India.
Sex, Drugs and Rock and Roll
Forced to disappoint you, there will be no detailed story. We love to experiment, but none of the insane acts contradicts our morality. Still, we want to tell something. Drugs are in India and in Nepal. Indians, like sacred cows, constantly chew something. Chewing mass paints saliva, mouth, teeth in red, sidewalks, walls, stopping pavilions of this country are obsessed. We think it is Bethel. In Nepal "flying without a parachute" too much. Although we are intense, it is still difficult to say how in these two countries to distinguish an ordinary drug addict from the one who is trying to escape from reality, for example, with the help of yoga. We have a slight turbidity reasoning happened only once – in Rishikesh we visited Ashram Maharishi Makhseh Yoga, where the group "Beatles" came for spiritual knowledge. It is believed that transcendental meditation forced the musicians to abandon the use of LSD. Energy in these places extraordinary!
Ladies of easy behavior have not seen anywhere. But in one of the cities to us approached three young people in women’s clothing. We kindly abandoned any of their services. But the local mafia had to pay. In Agra, we were on a very narrow street, which several people blown out. Our driver who knows tradition immediately paid 35 rupees and continued the way.
In general, to deceive in this expedition was easy, especially in India. The most interesting thing was the scheme in which the beggars and merchants participate. The first persuades tourists to buy them at least a kilogram of rice, the second says that they sell the croup only with bags. The generous tourist agrees, and after his departure, rice returns to the store, "actors" divide the fee.
Release me, Himalayas
We dreamed a lot of times to complete the expedition ahead of time, but the sense of responsibility to the viewer was forced to dive into the Wednesday, everything deeper. India is an incredible country, Nepal is unique. But before you go to these countries, you need to understand why you need it. Without a convincing answer, without serious motives – there is no need! "Hat House" increasingly attracts the attention of specialists in the field of history, fashion, so in the hunt for headlores, it is important to us not the amount, but the value of "Trofei". From the fifth stage of the Hat Master expedition, we brought 17 hats – with precious stones, from human bones.
From Delhi to Moscow we arrived on March 4. The capital of Russia seemed to us deserted and quiet – so we are tired of Indian bustle and chaos. Houses abandoned all the clothes in the washing machine and ran into the shower. After bathing in Gange, we were considered sinless, but it seems, then we did not have enough soap and shampoo.
