First in life Cruise on the "Costa Diadema" liner

First of all, I confess that I am deeply drinking and sometimes unusual. On the forum, once under another nickname about an independent trip to Gdansk with children in those long-standing times, when the visas was not yet, and there were vouchers for 10 rubles sold in the Soymaker’s Kiosks. Subjected to the tough obstruction, and the desire to write no longer arose. But I went to the cruise – and again I wanted to share.

Swearing with my wife we ​​started on the road to Perm-2 station, T.To.:
1. Spouse Lena left home decorations (butterfly for me and tricolor ribbons for her) prepared at my request to the Italian party.
2. Spouse Lena put on the house, leaving the house, completely undeveloped new sneakers.
3. Spouse Lena forgot the houses small euro and euro vehicles cooked for use.

fourteen.03.15 We left at the near train number 67 Abakan-Moscow. In the evening 15.03 On the Yaroslavl railway station we met a friend and conducted a storage in the chamber. Leaving luggage, we went to visit him, where his wife was waiting for us (girlfriend?) With dinner. I have a pleasant time by calling home on Skype and studying the brand of the Nazi Germany (the buddy acquired them for her cheap in Vienna), we headed for the Yaroslavl railway station.

In the storage chamber, the first misunderstanding of my fault happened: I handed only a check, and he began to demand aware. I refused, saying that I don’t have any token (I confidently stood an aluminum tag before my eyes, as in the theater), he asked once again to check the contents of the pockets, in the end of my wallet’s depth of my wallet, which turned out to be a gateway. Then we left for the Paveletsky railway station and at Aeroexpress (tickets were bought in advance through the Internet, saving 100 rubles.) Domodedovo Airport got to.

Runing without sleep and rest until 4 o’clock in the morning, we went to register. The flight was performed by the Spanish Aerocompany – Looc Source Vledgeer from Iberia at the A-320 Airbus with paid food and drink, with a bunch of screaming children. Children have shining without ceasing all four hours according to the chain reaction scheme. Three women were sitting through the passage, they drank a cognac from Dudich and watered men’s mud who could not calm their children without mothers. My attempt to join them was rigidly suppressed by his wife.

Having received a luggage in Barcelona, ​​shuddals got to the railway station, where they were consulted by a guard armed to the teeth, how to get to the port of Barcelona. Options were offered two: with a transfer with railway trains (trainers) on the railway train at SANTS stations and on the subway. Deciding that it will be more convenient to transfer from train to train, we bought a ticket T-10 and rushed to the road.

Going out at Estacio de Franca stations, we headed to the port. We have in bulk in stock, and we decided to walk on foot, especially since the masts of our cruise liner were visible on the horizon. As we mistaken! But first things first.

Just in case, asking the local idalgo, we got a detailed answer, as we need to go, somewhat embarrassed the words about the distant way and about the road to the mountain. Houching it all on the bad knowledge of Spanish, we have fun we had our suitcases. The road ran along the picturesque bay, the sun shine brightly, the mood was excellent, we walked and fantasized about what we will deal with the remaining time in Barce. And now, finally, a cruise liner appeared in all its glory with proud inscription . "Norvegian Jade". Very nice about him on the lawn sat down a small helicopter. Straight James Bond. We headed on. I will not fully tire you – our liner turned out to be the fifth in the account, the last in the port. We really switched through the bridge (by the way, the passage was closed according to him, as it was whisked him one half, and the other was painted), they repeatedly overtakes the shutters with the inscription "2 Euro", But we have come on foot.

Hit immediately for registration, waited a long time for their turn directly to land. Having gaining beer in the duty at the entrance, we rose without problems on board. Cabin 2010, number as usual – two beds, minibar in the refrigerator, toilet and shower. Two portholes were made from the crutz. Changed dinner for the first shift, t.To. Time difference between Perm and Spain 4 hours and dinner at 01.15 nights are not very kosher. Managed to have a snack on the afternoon a sandwiches with fruit from 16 to 17.30 in the cafe Lido Diana on the 10th Deca (Floor). Dinner took place in 18.45 in the Fiorentino restaurant on the 3rd floor. At the table turned out to be the most women from our aircraft from one city and with the same name, let’s say Valya-1 (Realgerlezhka), Valya-2 (business) and Valya-3 (housewife). Pouring beers, fell to bed, skipping a meeting with our Hostels Alexander Malko (Ukraine), Fire Safety and Evacuation and Circus Speech "Carlitos".

Second day. Palma de Mallorca. Met at the reception with Olga and Igor. They were old marine wolves, very pleasant in communication. The best advice was given to my wife, how to move around on a new sneakers to the bone of the legs. Olga offered to fold the register than we took up by 200% – bought new and folded.

Breakfasts again in Fiorentino, managed to try all the complex breakfasts of the peoples of the world, including Omelet and Eggs in Benedictine. Sitting at a table is better with foreigners, it is enough to say hello and wish a pleasant appetite, it is possible in our.

Shattl to the city cost 9.95 euros, and excursion (and only in English or Italian!) 49.95 Euro. Singing from Shufutinsky "Let you dream of Palma de Mallorca …", we moved toward the center on foot, past yachts, boats and even warships. I threw the mandarin from the branch, and we ate it with a warming faces – the content of vitamin C offshore! Sun shines, Cockada Fly, Lepot!

Going to a large park, in silence stood at the monument dedicated to the use of all participating and those who died in the Civil War and Frankistam, and Republicans. By the way, do you know that the expression "fifth column" went from this war in Spain, and the Republicans who returned to their homeland, after the death of Caudillo Franco was appointed by the state a military pension, and for the title that the Republican would receive serving by Fatherland not emigrating. It’s like that our ordinary whitewardians would return to Moscow after Stalin’s death, and his seats would appoint a retirement.

In the cafe Park, I talked with a teacher of English. She led to the Park of Children to coat on the playground, and herself saw coffee, burning in the sun. I told her about his classmate from Dobryanka Andrei Garcia (well, Soclaned, Okay, from the parallel …) – the famous Perm actor, Mama, Rosalia, was evacuated on the ship to Moscow, saving from bombing. The teacher listened to me with great interest.

Next, we went to the infocenter, where a young man, recognizing the Slavian in me, spoke to me in Polish. In response, I sang him the beginning of the hymn "still Polish did not cite", and already a chorus we performed "March, Marsh Dombrovsky". It turned out, he lives with a poison, hence and knowing the language. Having uttered some word, as it seemed to me, "Katyusha", I got about the flourishing sakur. He embarrassed and seriously said: "Not Katyusha, Katyn! 20 thousand Polish officers!"I had to tell him about the unsuccessful campaign of the Red Army on Warsaw under the command of Tukhachevsky and the death of almost all of our prisoners of war from the hands of Polish security guards and diseases.

There was an incident with an African American, trading souvenirs, who, noticing that I remove it, I ran for me a few blocks demanding to pay or remove the photo that I did with the great pleasure in his eyes.

Having found an underground three-storey supermarket, I tried to find out from young saleswoman the presence of Waifa. She led an English-speaking girl. With the word "WiFay" she made square eyes. It cost me to get the tablet, they both laughed and shouted, joyfully bouncing: "WiFi! Vifi!".

In the evening on the ship there was a party in white. At least one element of the wardrobe everyone had to be white. And if not, then they still allowed. In the theater, where we went to the whole table, waiting for the idea was delayed, and Valya-1, who began to warm up to tomorrow’s birth, went to the scene and, remembering his dance past, made a few pa. ours from all over the hall immediately reached for us, starting with the waitress with Yoshkar-Ola and ending the wife of a new our to. With the Son living in Spain in one of the resort towns.

At the concert performed an irresistible Stefano Milani. He sang an aria from opera. Particularly managed Aria from "Ghost Opera" and the song Andrea Bolli Feat. Sarah Brightman "Time to Say Goodbye" (By the way, under it, our liner moved away from the proprietary wall in each port). The concert really liked.

I went to Pirbar Dzardstibir Green, where I met the waiters Alexei from Chelyabinsk and Katya from Sevastopol. Beer was excellent, but expensive, up to 10 euros. About his quality says that beer is not included in one package with drinks, there is one carlsberg everywhere. But here were every day of the promotion, and it was possible to take beer of one variety for half.

Musicians played – the legendary German, who replaced, called the Kosta to the Council of Concordia (by that time I was sunken near Italy) on a banquet about putting into operation and Slovak. They were laughing living German music, but on my requests to play "Ein Heller und Ein Batzen", "Schwarzbraun IST Die Haselnuss" or, at worst, "Horst Wessel" I was responsible for refusing. Ask to execute "Volkhovskaya drinking" or "Artilleryrs, Stalin gave an order" I did not.

The people played a strange game: throwing balls from ping pong in the adversary glasses, the missing had to drink a glass of beer (allegedly accuracy after that is lost). There was also a funny Englishwoman in the body, which I was put on the phrase from Paul McCartney:
"English SPEAKING PEOPLE,
Drinking German Beer … "
She walked and said that too singer. "I got drunk!"- I thought and went to sleep.

Third day. In the sea. We decided to download the program to the phones, allowing you to maintain free communication on board- My Costa Mobail. No result. The reception was told that the wife’s phone does not support this program, and my skiing already at the very end – showed that the date of my birth was incorrectly indicated. Helped a lot of people, in different languages, but the end of one.

I decided to go swimming. Appealed to reception. The girl suggested to acquire two brews for 72 euros. I promised to think, and I myself went to our Cabin Stuart ketut from Bali. We have already talked to him, I told him about the current state of affairs with Buddhism in Russia, including about delicious poses in Dacan of St. Petersburg. He volunteered to help and freeze to me a robe of almost my size, just from the laundry, but with the condition that I would not take it as a souvenir in Perm. Remembering how painfully refers to Kuskow to the corrupting Bass-Bolshaev, I handed the red baseball cap with the inscription "80 years of Perm Neft", which he turned out to be extremely happy, but to be photographed in it for the cover of the corporate newspaper "Perm oil" refused to completely promise Make it tomorrow in the theater after the concert of the artistic self-playing team and service. As for this, tomorrow I was already heard: Katya from the beer bar promised to sing the song Zaz – Je Veux, and Hostesse Alexander even to dance. Who knew that Annushka had already shed oil, and tomorrow would never come ..

A little distracted and tell about the employees of Costa. They are all decently dressed in uniform clothes, on the chest of all badges with the name of the name, the countries of origin and the flags of the countries, in the languages ​​of which a person speaks. Once I needed a nut with a washer, and after turning to some officer (and maybe it was a captain?) I needed hardware after half an hour I have in my room.

About the service – from ours only Irina at the reception and hostesses of Alexander (holds daily meetings with our pacoxes on any issues – excursions and t.D.). Having even in the infancy of English, you can agree with any employee, despite the language, even if the bay is depicted a zhovto blakty flag of Ukraine, using a smile and deaf and dumb language.

The service is divided into screw (Cabin Stuart, cleaners, waiters) and STAFF (artists and other bohemia). Among themselves they are fighting, as Staff is drowned all day in a special bar (only for their own), and Screw is allowed only at a certain hour, the hours of work of the artists couple per day plus rehearsals, and screw passes daily for 11-13 hours in the morning with one weekend a week (and even on this day work a few hours in the evening). Screw also fight with each other on national soil, due to tips, reluctance to work and.D. Artists are England and Italy, servicehouse – Malaysia, Philippines, India, South America, Russia and Ukraine (from ten Slavs 2 girls have already escaped). Work 9 months, then vacation 2 months. You can quit on any day, the calculation tomorrow and immediately entering the port. S / n waiters about 1.4 thousand. Euro (food and accommodation in cabins for 2 people free). Euro growth and the fall of the ruble played them on hand. Money is transferred to the map, there is an ATM on board. Employment is engaged in Petropol from Peter.

In a new coat, I went to the outdoor pool. Near the bar Singing yesterday’s opera singer Stefano Milani and another man. I came across thanked for yesterday’s magic singing and tell about the younger son Kolya, who also sings in the choral chapel of boys and not only "about Sole Mio", but also sang in front of the Patriarch "God, King Kee" on the 400th hundreds of house of Romanov. The man turned out to be the director of the Cruise of Paolo and the entertainer of all concerts on the liner.

Talked – and I began to. Water – ice. I went out leisurely lasted. I called a woman: "You’re not our? And then only such and bathe today". Went to an indoor pool, there is warmer, but also in bulk. Wonderful in the jacuzzi – warm, bubbles, chat with a young couple from Spain.

In the evening there was a chic dinner from the captain. On the table – champagne, beautifully printed individual menu is rolled into the tube and tied with a ribbon with a bow. Everything is very stylish. Also celebrated Birthday at Vali-1. I ordered a cake at the reception for 11 euros, one more was from the captain. The light did not turn off, but they were solemnly and even sang toast.

After dinner, there was a photo with Captain Nikolo Alba, and for a couple of allotted minutes I managed to tell him that my eldest son-mechanic-driver tank (lied, but a little: in fact, BMP, but I could not unsubscribe Infantry Fighting VEHICLE). I was trying to knock this photo of this later by the local paparazzi for 14 euros. It ended in that I simply read it on the booth to the worst displeasure of the employee from Guatemala.

The theater was given "Kings and Queen Pop and Rock". It was the best concert! An Englishwoman from Pivbar sang for Madonna, and a young man for Freddie Mercury. Magic sang! The drummer pounded as if from the Kiss group – somewhere in heaven. Sound, light, dancing. Super. In the evening, I met the singer in the bar, he said that their name is Marina SIMIONI and Matthew Burn. What they live in sin, I learned in Facebook. I thanked for a speech and gave Matthew a number of delometric advice on the presentation of Amy Winehouse and Cyndi Lauper creativity, and also spoke about his acquaintance with the BBS speaker – Siele Novgorod.

In the evening, I accidentally heard Polish speech, came up, asked about the unintegral, offered to sit down. Included on the phone the song from k \ f "Four tankers and a dog" (caught), Cheslava Nemen "under parrots" (I thought all my life, that the translation is "under the sails", but it turned out – "under parrots" – the name of the cafe in Warsaw) Well, when Olga Tereshchenko (and from Belarus) Patched a song from k \ f "Fire and Sword" (on the novel g.SENKEVICH) "Hay, Sokolik", shumbled and began to sing. Beer for the evening I was provided. The history of this song is very interesting, t.To. Poles, Ukrainians and Belarusians consider her folk. And she tells about the Ukrainian Cossack, who went to a foreign land and longing in his homeland, and about his beloved girl who stayed there.
In the evening, we met a group of doctors from Azerbaijan, one of them the most drunk did a rack on the head, scoffing from the chair back himself.

Day four. Naples. How much I remember yourself, our houses hung a picture of Karl Bryullov "Last Day Pompeii". Idiot’s dream came true – and for 49.95 euros we went there on a tour with the our-speaking guide Evgenia. Since the bus consisted of two groups – our Italian, the guides were also two, and so as not to interfere with each other, each was issued a radio receiver with headphones. The our group included doctors from Azerbaijan, several Armenians, a Jewish couple from Germany and two women living with children and grandchildren in Spain. Evgeny began a story promisingly, told about the great.V.Gogol, who was treated here from excess gas formation in the intestine. Everything else was in the same spirit – about the spoon, one end of which ate, and the second was picking in the ear, about the transition from high stones, so as not to be littered, a public house with fresco-scenes from the local Kama Sutra and T.D. Fun and unbelieving that you still need a person on vacation? For a farewell, we were treated with local lemon lemoncell liqueur, infused on the lemon crusts, and attempted to dilute on grandmother in the factory for the production of camas. Overshaded the trip the fact of the disappearance of the Jewish grandmother, her searches took about 15 minutes, all this time the Italian group fully waited for us on the bus. Found in the end Banban brazen accused Eugene in the fact that she gave her a broken device. On this and broke up. Naples songs listened on the reference. When the song "Caruso" sounded, I, after the glass of Lemoncell, began to prove the Italians that it sings the Kolya Basque than led them to an obvious embarrassment.

Rising on board, got a new DIARIO DI BORDO, already taking into account the death of tourists from Costa Fascinosa cruise liner. According to the excursion program, they were offered a bus tour of the capital Tunisia, including visiting the Bardo Museum. The Costa administration promised that there is no longer a foot in Tunisia. All entertainment for the evening, including the Italian party (so they did not need forgotten in Perm decorations of the color of the Italian flag, in vain I was on my wife) and the concert of the amateur was canceled.

In 18.30 All employees on board stopped the work, went out in a dark form and built near the inner deck, held a minute of silence. Everything was very touching, especially since women for our table were told that they were offered in a travel agencies that exactly this route, but they did not suit the airport arrival. The evening was a curler, but soon all the bars and restaurants opened, life went to her. In the beer bar offered Finnam to listen to the song "No, Molotov". They refused, referring to the fact that they do not understand our. They did not know that I was also recorded an option in their native language. Have fun, something shrotted in Chukhonski. Include the Finns Song "Take, Us, Suomi-Beauty" did not risk, apparently drank little.

Fifth day. La Spice. We have all the table (except for the birthday book) with the family of Susanins headed on the railway station. Having passed a beautiful monument with three aircraft, the multicolored inversion trail of which was the flag of Italy with the inscription "the pilots of Italy, heroically died in battles for the capitalist homeland" (by the way, could not find any information about the monument in the internet, who can know? Igor said that allegedly in 1983, the crew of local "strides" broke here). The road further ran through the market where the rolls were sold in the form of whole pigs with heads, the heads of the cheeses and inflatable balls in the form of a heroine M \ f "Masha and the Bear".

In the infocenter at the station, we were offered maps, the schedule of electric trains and reported on the work of the trail on the whole section of Cinque Terre. It seemed to us sufficient for the first time to get to Vernatza and back to Cornilia. Further by circumstances.

By purchasing tickets in the automatic cash desks, the "TsYUGAN COLOR" stormed an u / train and actively working with his elbows, they snew into a nearby car, they finally sat down and began to chat with legs, looking at the window on the window, and looked there for something – All Pacs before landing composed tickets in a special device standing on the platform. Borjomi was too late, the train went. After a short friendly passage and search for the guilty, we calmed down and agreed that this type of travel makes some extreme in our voyage and adds pephots. I quoted from the classic:
"There are hares White,
There are gray hares,
What color are you,
Comrade without a ticket?"

So everything ended with laughter if one of our faces, going to the toilet, did not report that the auditor rides. But luck was on our side – a cute supervisor girl cried near WC and did not come to us.

Bullet departing from the train, we once again appealed to the infocenter, now the local. Received updated data (and directly opposite, obtained in spices), having adopted by the embankment and turning right among pharmacy moved on the path on the path.

And I must say that in 1987, I worked for almost a year in the TsK VLKSM voucher in the All-Union Pioneer Camp "Artek" named after.AND.Lenina. And on the mountain ayu-dag Lasil with pioneers monthly, Iuju and herbs (about themselves in all cases). Apparently, in this case, I decided that the trail in this case will be simply a pedestrian road between two settlements with grapes on the trellis or olive groves on the sides, and local Italian landscapes and landscapes will collect (impact, process, instill emphasize), hailing the flags of our countries and shouting toasts in honor of friendship between our truly great peoples.

First in life Cruise on the

In fact, it turned out to be a narrow trail in the mountains, laid out with a pronounced rise and even more pronounced descent. Considering that one crawl in the thigh instead of the bone was a metal pin, I recalled the words of one of the Chekhov characters: "Oh, I would not have to fully!", These 2.8 km seemed eternity. But on the other hand, breathtaking coast, w / d ways, tunnels and trains, from such a distance looked like toy, it was worth.

We descended from the mountains to the temple, near which the crowd was stood led by Pastor, drove a catfalc, and the coffin was made for the funeral. It was a local resident, a tourist killed in Tunisia (without comment, I decided so) and assured everyone else. Valya and my spouse move on on foot refused and we divided – Susanins went further, and we sat down on the bus, despite 2.4 euros for travel.

At the station I decided to purchase tickets, not in the news agency, but in the machine (my wife was against, but I insisted). Immediately embarrassed the inscription on the screen about the fact that the cache for payment do not take, but only the cards. Still lacked, I thought, shovel a card, and her Kirdyk, remain without an advance of the 28th. After carrying out all the necessary actions to buy 4 tickets, I crushed 10 euros in the gap and everything … The device covered. I made a photo print screen, addressed an employee of the news agency and explained to me that it does not have anything to do with this machine, but I still did not work the plate. I have not fallen behind him until he gave me his phone named (Andrei) in case of a meeting of the controller. With fear, I even composed old Tickets of Spice-Vernatza in the mythical hope that it would help me. Our bidding did not risk and bought new tickets, t.To. One of them saw once, as a non-flying tourist fined at 75 euros. When we left, Andrei stood on the platform and waved to us after the boat, because in 10 minutes we are:

1.Downloaded it with their own problems with the machine.
2.Asked the location to show the platform.
3.Asked to post old invalid tickets.
4.Bought 2 new tickets.
5.Asked to post new tickets.
6.Asked to fill us in a bottle of cold water.
7. Asked to post new tickets for the appeared sussanins.

I got to the ship without problems and inspections, in the room we were waiting for an angry letter from the captain that the cruise ends soon, and we still did not pass briefing, and if today … then we will take advantage of REE on the 20th deck. Forces to wear savages were not none, and we came to the place of collection of light, our cards scanned and let go with God.

In the evening, a concert "Aromas of Italy" was held in the theater in the style of the San Remo festival, very similar to the film, which was filmed in the film "Thaw". Artists are the same – Marina SIMIONI and Matthew Burn.

Day of the Six. Savona. Let’s go on an excursion to Monaco for 69.95 euros. The composition of the group was about the same – doctors from Baku, but without Armenians and Jews from Germany. The guide was a lady named Al Alma (ex-SPb), no technical means were observed in risen, and half-bus, as always, were Italians. The guide was alone at all, so at first Al Alma spread out the thought of the tree in the language of the great Gianni Rodari, and then something vaguely buried in our.
By and large, there was nothing to listen to, we passed by the oceanographic museum, through the Grace Kelly Park (the mystery of the death of which was not revealed so far) and visited the cathedral with her grave. The Baku People were annealed in full, all the polls are armed with sticks for selfie and from afar reminded the golf course team, and when one of them had a cellular and under the temple villages- "Brother, brother! And you know where I stand now? At the grave of the Great Grace Kelly! Ah, you do not know who is.TO.?"

Then, on the main square, I looked at the shift of Karaul, the Monegasi funnyly clapped themselves on his flames and headed to the city of Vokoka Monte Carlo. On the way I got a store of souvenirs, where some kind of crap once bought Valentine Tereshkova. The memory of this lives in the hearts of the owners of this shop and is forever captured in the photo of the cosmonaut, hanging over the cashier.

In Monte Carlo Alma began to rub about the great our artist of the ballet of Sergei Dyagilev, and considering that the family of Perm and even gymnasium №11 wears his name, Alma was posted and found out from me that my namek never danced, but only Ballen with Nizhinsky and that he was a brilliant impresario (found money from nowhere), buried in Venice, and what his "our seasons" in Europe glorified his name forever, Alma knew without me.

In the casino we did not go, t.To. The camera is taken there at the entrance, and the money for the game is my spouse and so knows where to spend. Walked around the park, looked cool cars in the parking lot, glanced on the track and monument to Formula 1.

By the way, we were offered an excursion "All Secrets Costa Diadema" for 39.0 (29.0 for members of the Costa Club) euro with a ban on any shooting and without communication with the captain. Apparently, the glory of Concordia rest does not give, I repeatedly heard from the team members a bike about the fact that when she was tone, the captain demanded a dessert in a restaurant, and in the light of the last events, a girl from Ukraine appeared next to him.

In the evening in the theater there was a show "Feel the BEAT". The dances were very good, and when the dancers began to beat off a chchelet in the vessels with water, I was glad that I was not sitting on the first row. Somehow in the theater got acquainted with the former compatriot, and now almost Spanish, a very pleasant blonde with her son. Once in the bar witnessed, as a young waiter began to beat her wedges, letting the dubious compliments, undressing her with an alching look, and when he learned that her our husband had a business construction, he almost fell to her knees, begging to pick it up (The specialty of his diploma was precisely – PGS: industrial and civil construction).

Seventh day. Marseilles. We were very upset by the cost of the Kostovsky Shuttle to the city center – 12.95 euros. An attempt to penetrate the bus without a ticket (on the advice of the good Ufa countrymen) and punish the greedy capitalists of the Costa family, was suppressed by the young French-inspector, who, like that blue thief, offered us to ride for only 12.0 euros. Quenching a distance of 6 km, we moved to the road. Passing 300 meters, we saw a group of German Pax, clearly something waiting. On my question of what, we were shy stated that they are waiting for free (now the port) bus. Joining them, after 10 minutes we have already approached the metro station Juliet. Deciding that not focusing in the city and performances without having about his sights, it makes sense to admire the beauty right here. Immediately our gaze appeared a huge Cathedral of Saint-Mari-Major. Inside was the grave of St. Eugene, suspiciously late canonized in the 90s of our century. I photographed sitting at the department. At the top where the Nimbe was to be located, the inscription was shone with the name of the Saint Lazar. At the exit, I filed the alms on Parity, and he, having recalculated several of my eurocents, had a long time, I had a long time, apparently, demanding the abolition of sanctions and publicize revenues Sechin and Yakunin.

The next focus of the culture was the beautiful museum of "Provence" in the form of a ship. Going in the lobby and familiarized with the photo albums of the artists of the current exhibitions-Lumieres Du Sud and Alfred Lombard, the spouse decided to buy souvenirs, and we came to the checkout. The girl smiled sweetly and asked if we were not. Having received an affirmative answer, she proudly threw her head and stated that she was from Poland. I, long thinking, took out the phone, turned on the song and in the academic silence of the museum there was a loud:
Hej, Hej, Hej Sokoły
Omijajcie Góry, Lasy, Doły.
DZWOń, DZWOń, DZWOń DZWONECZKU,
Mój Stepowy Skowroneczku.

The girl jumped, screamed: "Turn off!"- and ran somewhere. Opinions on further events were divided. I offered to immediately retire, t.To. The cashier went to call Azhanov, who distinguish me into the local progress for violating the rules of the capitalist hostel, whose incapsites are still remembered by the authors of "Mosselease". A more practical wife said that the cashier just gone to change the euro. The wrongs were both – Returning, the girl had a very unsightly species-tears in the eyes, swollen nose. Under the nose, she muttered- "Sorry, Emoshn, Home …".

Next, we visited the Fort Saint-Jean, on the sign of which I saw the word Mort (death), where they found out that the concentration camp was in war here. Fort smoothly passed through a bridge-transition to the Museum of Civilizations in Europe and the Mediterranean (even with a fragment of the Berlin Wall). There we decided to call home, but even if there is WiFi, Skype did not work. I had to turn to the reception where, after several unsuccessful attempts, the young man took us to the basement to a pretty compatriot from Essentukov. That, too, could not help, but we greatly swatched, she trolls us for transferring cash flows to Europe instead of the resorts of the North Caucasus, and I revenge her, remembering the murder of m.NS.Lermontova on Mount Mashuk. On the board returned to the same port shuttle.

In the evening in the theater Acrobats of Selia and Juliented with the show "Fly with me". Up to one morning, it was necessary to put the luggage in the corridor with a color label with a name, cabin and phone. Fur label remains with you, it is non-informative, just that we know your color. But already from the color depends on your departure time from the ship. Labels were white (out of 9.30), Yellow, Purple, Blue, Orange, Pink, Brown, Blue and Gray (like us – Exit at 11.00). Manual sting could be left up to 11.00 in the storage chamber, in the drunken bar (it is clear that the name comes from "piano"), it is relevant, t.To. The cabin must be released at 8.00. Cards are also blocked in 01.00 Nights. You certainly can also write already on a blocked card, but you will not be released from the ship, t.To. All cards are scanned when leaving. Therefore, we looked at our friends, the lucky owners of the Extra drinks package (175.0 euros per person, the cabin is purchased for each pacox) in incredible quantities of continuing (right up to lifting on the trapp) high-quality European alcoholic drinks and beautifully decorated cocktails. (AU, Costa, I will break something for advertising?). Especially envy, in truth, there was nothing.To. In the evening, the Security Service (Sat) issued a pacoxes all seized in Barcelona and prohibited to transported items on the ship – drinking water, irons, boiling plants and, of course, alcohol. The theme of the transition and seizure of alcohol on board is infinite (what the FV is talking about). I got it a couple of times, and both times I caught. The first time the Philipps almost took the beer, but I prayed that on the day of St. Patrick, you can carry beer, and I was released with a beer (although it was not Guinness). The second time, the Hinders from the Sat had a horn to the monitor – two banks in the camera from the camera, six are sought-after pockets and . We released again.

Day eighth. Barcelona. Rain and wind. Without waiting for the morning, I received an account at the reception under the sad heading "Arrivalchi!"And more funny outcome – a refund of 41.90 euros, koi and were returned to me until the last eurocent.

On the shore in Barcelona we were waiting for apartments with a balcony (to drink wine with warm evenings) on Marina Street. It was so cold at night that we slept under two blankets. In the morning I went to the reception and asked to turn on the air conditioner to heat, it turned out that he worked, it was just necessary to turn on and wait (!) 5 minutes. Muna girl told everything in great detail, listened to all our wishes and gave a bunch of tips (even about the fact that the Rock Museum is closed) and poured a little washing powder. On the first day we got lost – the Sagrada ranked twice in search of the stop. It turns out, even with one-sided movement, the bus line is highlighted here. In search of a supermarket asked a man with a child with a child in Loman Catalan. The man began to teach that we are our people and should speak great and mighty. And grilling at the end: "I’m not from this distribut", – Dummeted. The store was still found, and it was "Leedle". Democratic prices, good alcohol selection. When I began to calculate the Petrocommer’s card, asked the passport, presented a bone card (by the way, without a photo). Rolling. I bought tickets for bass touristik and urged rolled over blue and red lines. Green specializes in the beaches and coast, opened the other day. They went to the shopping center of Arena, where the corrida took place before, bowed to the place where there was a rock museum. There is now the exhibition "Human body". In another shopping center (pl. Catalonia) in the souvenir shop found the breeze chip- "Caaganner" – Figurka of the fellow man and the guided larger need, which means a symbol of fertility. There are politicians (all, even ours), football players and, if not blasphemous, it sounds, not by night a mad John Lennon.

I visited the Cemetery of the Poyemo, where the pretty guard demanded to remove the camera (the requirement of the administration), and learning that I was from Russia and looking for a monument "Kiss of Death," brought me a cemetery avenue with a map, helped to sent on the ground and even allowed to make one photo.

Farewell dinner took place in such an authentic restaurant that workers were sitting in dirty foxes at the next table. I ordered a squash – roasted onion onion, brought a special whirlwind. It was upset that all ingredients for the preparation of tomato-garlic bread were eaten by me individually, and the recipe for the preparation of this bread was depicted on the company’s company’s business card, which was given to me only when calculating.

On the subway only opened his mouth to find out the road, two simple Catalan women approached and asking: "An airport?" – Conducted us almost to the aircraft.

First in life Cruise on the

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